What will happen when I am gone for 40 hours of his week?
I will no longer be a part of his normal day.
Will I be replaced?
Will he still need me to comfort him?
What I am no longer his favorite person in the whole wide world anymore?
Please don’t stop reading when I say this.. I’ve been crying most of the day. Ahh! So lame right?
In my little brain, by taking a full time job I am losing all (free) time. How am I suppose to get anything done if I want to spend any time with my boys. So in the few hours that I have been home today, I’ve tackled just about my entire to-do list! Literally. I am even thinking about organizing my sock drawer. I ironed like three shirts! Might be a record. This day has me craving chocolate.. I’m actually eating a KitKat as I type this.. if you know me you know that’s bad, I don’t even eat chocolate!
Whew! Now that we all want to cry, or just slap some sense into me, let me tell you just how perfectly God orchestrated this job for me. Last week Scott and I were talking about “life”, money, debt, nothing very fun. I mentioned to him that maybe I should call up the water district I worked for a couple of years ago and check in. My exact words were, “I guess I could work full time if I knew it would only be temporary.” (this is me telling you to be careful what you wish for) As you all know I have been nanny’ing (yes using my made up word again) two girls twice a week. Momma of the girls is pregnant with baby girl number three and I was helping out until she went on maternity leave in March-ish. Well, the Friday before last I happened to ask her when she was planning her leave (we hadn’t talked about details yet) and she was going to be talking to me that day because her doctor was going to be putting her out early.. She had two weeks left, meaning that February 5th (yes today) would be my last day with the girls. Two hours after our conversation, the temp agency that I have gotten previous jobs through calls me out of nowhere with a job position for a (different) water district. Since then I have been meeting with the agency, getting things scheduled with the employer, had my interview yesterday at 9:00 and by 10:30 I am being informed that I have the job. What?! How can I even think about not taking this job. As bummed as I am about leaving Grayson, to not take this opportunity would be ridiculous. I feel like it would be saying, God I know this is a gift from you buuut, I don’t want it thank you anyway. I’m not that crazy!
Although I may or may not have told the guy during my drug testing to please take his time with the results so that I wouldn’t have to start working until Monday.. I hope he listens.
So this is me.. talking to myself.. looking in the mirror and saying it’s time to put the big girl panties on and do this job, and do it unto the Lord. Like without complaining. I am going to make Him proud and shine my little light right from my cubicle. But only for six months! Okay? Okay.
And ps. we have to take G to a pediatric dentist to see about his teeth.. That should be fun.